Stupid but funny

[Assassin]

How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.

How do you get holy water?
Boil the hell out of it.

What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"

What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.

What do prisoners use to call each other?
Cell phones.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
A stick.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho Cheese.

What do you call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?
Quatro sinko.

What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill
you if it fell out of a tree?
A pool table.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.

Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
They're trying to get away from the noise.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers

Did you hear about the flasher that was thinking about retiring?
He decided to stick it out for one more year.

What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?
Sanka.